Torn from Two Read online

  Rex rounded the corner, asking something about cufflinks, and I jumped, smearing my eyeliner across my face. “Shit!” I screamed, not caring that Rex hated it when I swore. “Okay, Penny, what’s wrong? You’ve been as nervous as a cat all day,” he said, leaning against the marble sink as I wiped away the errant cobalt blue line from my skin.

  “I guess I’m just…I’m not sure how to tell them that I’m with both of you.”

  “Ah,” he answered, his face relaxing. “Well, listen, you don’t have to. Just take Nate as your date—they already know you’re with him. I’ll stay here—I’ve been dying to read that new book about—”

  I shook my head and interrupted, “No, I want you there. I told Madison I was bringing both of you and that I’d explain, and I will. You’re not getting out of wearing a tie that easily.”

  He took me into his arms and held me tight. “Well, listen, I’ll let you lead. If you want to just say I’m a friend of Nate’s or whatever, it’s fine.”

  “It’s not fine.” Nate was at the door, his hands on his hips, staring daggers at us. He looked like perfection, as always. No one wore a suit like the billionaire Nathaniel Slater. But, he was clearly pissed off.

  “I just meant she doesn’t need to ruin this occasion with that, there’s time later to…” Rex tried to explain.

  Nate shook his head, walking over to straighten Rex’s tie. “So,” he said coldly, his deft fingers styling Rex, “we’re all three, we don’t care what others think, it’s right for us—all that is just talk then? Lip service? Empty? Clearly it’s stuff we say only when others who might not approve aren’t around. I call bullshit to that, my lovers. It wasn’t easy for me to tell my father and my sister about us, but I did. Why should we hide?” Nate shrugged his shoulders and stepped back. He was right, and I knew we’d hurt him.

  “Come on man, you’re being melodramatic,” Rex said with a wave of his hand, “I’m not saying she shouldn’t tell them, just maybe not tonight. This event isn’t about us, it’s about the bride and groom.”

  Nate nodded, unconvinced, “Uh huh, so that’s the real reason, Rex?” His question hung in the air as I finished getting ready, still unsure what I planned to do.

  I slithered into a snug red dress, holding my breath as Nate zipped me up. He held my hand as I stepped into my new sky-high stilettos, and with no regard for his own expensive suit, he knelt down on the floor to strap them around my ankles.

  With a quick kiss to the top of my foot he said, “Penelope, my love, you are a perfect vision tonight.” I smiled—Nate was always my handsome Prince, my knight in shining armor. He was caring, intuitive, and knew the perfect thing to say to light me from within. I never felt more beautiful than when I saw myself in Nate’s eyes. He stood up in front of me and took my hands in his, leading me out to the living room where Rex was finishing his bourbon, staring at the beat-up Omega watch he always wore.

  “We’re running five minutes behind, what the hell took so…” He stopped mid-sentence when he looked up from his drink and saw us, arm in arm, in front of him. Rex’s scowl softened into a warm glow as he set the crystal tumbler down. “You two, wow, you are both stunning. I have no idea what you see in an old rough-around-the-edges asshole like me,” Rex said, walking toward us.

  “We love you, old man,” I teased, falling to his side. “I love it when you dress up.”

  Rex glanced down at his dark suit, “Whatever, baby. I want out of these clothes, and I want you both out of yours. I’m ready for round two.” He pulled Nate to his other side, wrapping us in his comforting, protective embrace. “I love you both. Let’s get this thing over with and get naked,” he growled, walking our party of three toward the door.

  Downstairs, Madison was glowing as we made our way through the throng of friends and family to say our congratulations. Her fiery-orange hair was gleaming under the florescent lights of The Penelope’s Ballroom #2 as we approached her. I’d always had long, straight blonde hair, so the contrast of Maddie’s carrot-orange wild mane of chin length waves always fascinated me. We were first cousins, united by being the only children of my father and her mother, but we could not look more different. Her hazel eyes found mine—she was a super nova of joy that summer evening in my father’s casino. She grabbed me and we spun around like first graders, high on the euphoria of seeing each other in person after over a year apart and countless hours on the phone plotting and planning for this very moment.

  “Shut the front door, Penny, you look so grown up!” Madison had always been child-like, innocent. Her parents sheltered their only child; they wrapped her in a protective, loving bubble, unlike my own dysfunctional parents who had the “throw her into the wild” approach to child rearing. Her fiancé, Chad, was her first and only lover, I’d found out over the phone last month. They hadn’t waited for their wedding night, but Maddie was innocent to the extreme. I squeezed her tight as her eyes drifted to the two men I’d arrived with.

  “Oh, this is…” she paused, glancing to Rex, then back to Nate.

  “Madison Bauer, this is Nathaniel Slater, my b—”

  “Boyfriend!” she squealed. “I know! We’ve met, Mr. Slater, do you remember? Back on that cross-Atlantic cruise with all the lacrosse players from Duke? I was going with Lance Dutton, and your sister was on it, oh it’s been forever! But I’m so happy you’ve found my Penny!”

  She smiled from ear to ear as she hugged Nate as if they were old friends. The elegant Nate hugged the gushing Madison as her fiancé, only slightly less shiny than Nate, approached. “Oh, and who is this solid mass of a man?” she asked as Chad touched her elbow.

  “Maddie, Doctor Rex Renton,” I stuttered out as Rex reached to shake her hand.

  She ignored his outstretched hand and wrapped her perky-self around him, glancing at me, “Doctor? You’re not sick?” She blanched, memories of my dying mother haunting her happy moment.

  “No, no, Maddie. Rex is my…” I stopped there, unsure how to finish as they all waited patiently for me to explain.

  Chad came to my rescue, pulling at Maddie. “Darling, we need to get started. Mother has a video presentation she would like to begin. I do apologize,” he said, nodding his head.

  “Of course, we’ll chat later,” Rex said, leading us away from the happy couple and toward our place cards in the crowded ballroom.

  We found our seats, my men on each side of me, as a video began to play. I scanned the dark room for my father, but didn’t see either him or my stepmother. Madison was at the head table, next to her fiancé, their parents flanking them. She was beaming as Chad took her hand, nodding toward a bald baby picture of Maddie. Their love radiated from them; it was unmistakable.

  My left hand was wrapped in Nate’s, our fingers intertwined as the video droned on. A waiter passed with Champagne flutes on a gleaming silver tray—we each took one. Still nervously awaiting my father, I drained mine, not waiting for the toast we were supposed to be reserving them for. My foot twirled, my leg shook as there was still no sign of Dad. I looked at my phone, our tablemates glaring at the sudden burst of light from my screen. I drained Nate’s bubbly, then started in on Rex’s—his eyes were on the video and he didn’t notice. I crossed my legs, letting my foot shift from side to side as I scanned the entrance. A large hand slid along my bare right thigh, holding my leg still. I took a deep breath and relaxed a little—Rex’s touch always calmed me. I glanced to the table behind us—a petite woman with a severe pixie haircut was staring at me, her nose crinkled up, a sneer on her lips. She looked familiar, but her disapproval was pointed at Rex’s hand on my leg. I was holding Nate’s hand above the table, and underneath, Rex was caressing my leg. Even with three glasses of Champagne in less than seven minutes, I realized how that looked to Miss Judgy Judgy. I shot her a harsh look and scanned the room again.

  The endless video continued, moving on to Chad’s charmed and perfect life. I signaled the waiter, and with three fingers told him we needed more drinks. Nate slid him a t
ip before turning to me, already halfway through my fourth glass. “Go easy, babe,” he said with a squeeze of my left hand. Go easy? I rolled my eyes at Nate, thankful Rex didn’t notice. I drained the flute and switched it with the one in front of Rex, ignoring Nate’s annoyed sigh.

  At the bottom of that glass, the bubbly hit me. We hadn’t been served dinner yet, and the room spun a little as the eternal video finally came to an end. Nate released my hand to applaud with the rest of the room. There was still no sign of dear ol’ Daddy, and I suspected he’d decided not to come. He probably wouldn’t have the balls to miss his niece’s wedding, taking place at his hotel, but I’m sure there were emergencies large enough to warrant skipping out on the pre-wedding dinner.

  “Doesn’t anyone rehearse anymore? What happened to a rehearsal and a rehearsal dinner?” I asked too loudly in Rex’s ear. He shrugged, and gave me a warm smile, pulling me into him. “What’s wrong with you? Why aren’t you acting like Colonel Rex?” I hissed, Miss Judgy Judgy sneering at us again.

  He kissed me on the cheek, and whispered, “I know this is hard for you, baby.”

  Where is bossy Rex, King of the Jungle? I need someone to whip my childish ass into shape, not coddle me!

  The lights came on in the ballroom as some overly-fancy appetizer was served, scallops something. I looked over to Maddie and Chad again—they were glowing, the public expression of their love filling the velvet-swaddled room. I looked to Nate, in his shiny silver Hugo Boss suit, his pale tie the color of his light eyes. I loved him fully, entirely. Rex’s leg leaned against mine under the crisp white tablecloth as I turned to watch him shovel the scallops indiscriminately into his mouth. I smiled—I knew exactly what he thought about the first course. My Rex would be thinking, “Fancy shit, but fuck it, it’s protein and better than the stuff I catch with a safety pin in the Amazon.” I loved him too, fully. Neither of these men had half of my heart—they, together, combined with their love for one another, possessed all of me. And yet, here we sat, being glared at for touching, guarding our every move, ashamed to be three people in love—hiding our affection under a tablecloth. I sipped at the Champagne, trying to avoid the disapproval of my men.

  Wine was served with the rest of the meal, and although Nate and Rex were content, chatting away with each other and our tablemates about Colombia, the stock market, politics, and other current events, I sipped more wine than I should have. A storm was brewing inside me, a defiant, rebellious tempest was stirring, and deep inside me it burned hotter than an ulcer. It all started to scream—why does Maddie get to show her love freely? Why does she get this big family wedding that I’ll be denied? Who said you could only love one man, that only one could love you, that three people couldn’t have the same form of happily ever after that “straight” people did? By the dessert course, the questions were howling, distracting me from the benign small-talk going on around me.

  Nate spoke to me as the waiter cleared our dessert plates. His words were mumbled as if I were underwater. “What?” I said too loudly, even surrounding tables turning to look at me.

  Rex caressed my bare knee under the safety of the tablecloth, and said into my ear, “Lovely Nathaniel asked if you’d like some coffee, baby, are you okay? We can go. I’ll tell them you aren’t feeling well.”

  Coffee? Leave? Rex’s hand felt good on my skin… Nate’s hand took mine again. This was heaven. I needed more wine. All I could manage was to shake my head and say, “No, I’m good.”

  Rex and Nate sipped their coffee and continued to socialize as if everything were normal as I looked around the room again. Still no Dad, and everything was not normal. Maddie smiled at me and waved from her throne in front of her adoring room. The din of the room, of the polite conversations kept at the surface, swelled around me as I snuck more wine, switching Nate’s full glass for my half empty one as he got animated in a discussion about virtual offices. My legs felt like rubber as I decided it was time to go; I’d over done it. I leaned to Rex and whispered, “I think I need to go.” He nodded and pushed his chair back, but froze, his head whipping to me in alarm. Someone was speaking on the microphone at the front of the room. It was Maddie’s mother, my aunt Sophie. She was saying my name, and the throng of friends and family were clapping. Rex looked to Nate and shook his head—but they were all looking at me. Aunt Sophie spoke again as Maddie gestured for me to walk to the front of the room.

  “Come on, honey, don’t be shy—first we’ll have the maid of honor, Madison’s cousin Penelope. Say a few words, dear,” Aunt Sophie said, walking toward me with the wireless mic. Nate looked at me with alarm as I stood, stumbling toward Aunt Sophie. There was a snicker from my left as I took the microphone—it was Miss Judgy Judgy, laughing at me. Well, fuck her, I thought as I began to speak. Words came from my sloshy mouth—normal words, touching words about the friendship I had for my dear cousin. The crowd clapped, nodded, and looked to the happy couple in adoration as I spoke. Until, I looked over at Nate. He nodded at me, relieved that I was able to pull it together. He mouthed the words, “I love you.” I looked to Rex, and saw his reverent eyes go from me to Nate and back again—he loved us both with a love that few twosomes could match. The dam inside me burst, and I said into the echoing microphone, “Love is patient, love is kind…” Aunt Sophie rose to relieve me of the mic as I walked nearer to my men to escape her.

  I continued, “I love these two men, they are my life. I know that society may never accept it, but I don’t care. They love me, Maddie,” I said, looking to my cousin for support, but she was horrified—the sheer shock of an awkward moment washing over her, ruining her perfect evening, the start of her perfect wedding, the eve of her perfect life. Her cheeks glowed as red as her hair as she gestured for someone, anyone, to relieve me of the floor. But, I continued, the oppression of hiding rolling off of me, I was free as I told the room that, “Not only do I love both of these men, and they me, but they…” Rex stood and gave me the iconic hand-across-the-throat knock it off gesture, his dark suited, hulking presence walking toward me amidst the stares of the room. But it was too late. “…they love each other too! They are in love, and with me, and we three—I mean we share a bed and we are all three…” I paused then—my rambling, drunken, highly inappropriate speech wasn’t halted by Maddie, or her mother, or even by Rex—it was mercifully cut short by a loud clap from the side of the cavernous ballroom. We all looked to the door to see my father standing there.

  He continued his applause, even as his young wife blanched and attempted to lure him to their table. Brushing her aside, he walked toward me, seizing the mic and wrapping his arms around me. Rex paused, frozen, as my father spoke into the microphone. “Ah, that’s my Penny! A true Vegas girl, why have one man when you can have two! Have it all, I always say! I’m happy to host this event, and all of this weekend’s wedding festivities and accommodations have gladly been provided on the house by The Penelope. I’m happy to do it for my dear sister.” He glanced to my sulking Aunt Sophie in warning, reminding her that this was his house and despite our differences, I was his daughter. She sat down next to Maddie, who had collapsed into Chad. “Start the music! Let’s dance!” my father roared like an emcee before walking me toward the door.

  I leaned into him, my tipsy body teetering on my stilettos. Within seconds, strong arms were lifting me from my father—it was the spicy scent of Nate.

  “Mr. Slater, we’ll chat tomorrow,” I heard my father say as another set of strong arms wrapped around the other side of me.

  “We’ve got you, baby,” the deep baritone of Rex boomed into my ear as they walked me out of the ballroom and into the blaring lights of the hallway.

  Chapter Three

  “What did I say in there?” I asked as my men led me through the convention area, the snaking trails of the casino, and to the exclusive guarded elevator that would lead us up to our suite, high above Las Vegas.

  “Well, Penny, the cat is pretty much out of the bag now,” Nate answered proud
ly. “Do you feel free?”

  I looked into his entrancing eyes and saw how badly he wanted me to feel the freedom of some sort of “coming out” that he felt, but I didn’t. “I-I mostly just feel like, ‘Holy crap, why did I say that during a maid of honor speech?’”

  He nodded, sliding his key card into the elevator panel to allow us access to the penthouse floor. “Yeah, I guess I didn’t exactly expect you to tell them like that, I mean with a microphone,” Nate said. I leaned against the wall as we ascended, feeling queasy and guilty for my behavior. Maddie had to be furious.

  Tears sprang to my eyes, but then, as the elevator came to a stop at the top, Rex began to laugh. Not a chuckle, but a hard, debilitating belly laugh. “That was classic—did you see the reaction from the prude sitting behind us? She was about to burn Penny at the stake until she heard the part about two men together. I think she was so wet at the idea she almost slid out of her chair,” he choked out through his laughter. It was contagious, and Nate started laughing, wiping his eyes as we walked into the suite. I could see the humor, but at the moment, I wasn’t in a place to laugh, but I was glad they weren’t furious with me.

  I collapsed onto the sofa as their laughter eventually faded away. “We’ll have to flirt with Miss Pixie-Haired Prude tomorrow at the wedding,” Nate teased, kneeling down to take the straps off from around my ankles, freeing my sore feet of the designer stilettos. I fought to keep my eyes opened as Nate massaged my feet—my knight in shining armor also gave the very best foot rubs. “Are my giant feet next?” Rex flirted as he pulled loose the oppressive tie and unbuttoned his shirt. Nate’s glorious touch moved to my other foot as I fought the urge to find my phone and call Maddie. I began to nod off as Nate answered, “Let me finish the pampered Princess here and I’ll give your big guys some love.” I could hear the ice clink into Rex’s tumbler as he said, “I hope we’re talking about more than my feet.” One last impulse to call my cousin floated by my pickled brain before I gave up and fell into a hard sleep.